book newb

Never lose hope

There is no shortage of fear and pessimism these days. We mourn lost loved ones. We feel shock after losing jobs, anger towards incompetent leaders, and resentment towards failed relationships. Maybe that’s just part of life and it’s all part of being human. But it doesn’t make it less bearable. We still feel pain when, not if, the time comes.

We look to people who come before us and if we’re lucky, they guide our path even if they didn’t have the same guidance growing up. I see Anne Lamott as one. I get the impression that she genuinely cares, and not out of some performative, or an underlying motive. In this book, she shares her life stories, lessons she has learned and her perspective on why hope matters.

My takeaways from the book

• Bad things happen; good things happen too. Tragedies happen, but given a chance we also rise up or we endure
• It’s an inside job. You won’t find peace from the outside. It comes from the inside. This also means people must find it on their own – including our children. Set them up enough that they can walk on their own, and you set them free. Resist the urge to try to fix them at any point they fail.
• We’re both flawed and pure, there is no fix. We just forgive and let life flow through us. If we’re lucky, we have moments of awe and wonder in between.
• Unplug from time to time
• On hatred – do not let hate consume you. Do not let them make you hate them.
• In general, writing will not make you rich, famous and powerful. If you want to write, do it because you want to do it. It’s okay to write badly, that’s how you get better.
• On the fear of death – we’d be better to get to know it more because then it becomes less scary. Approaching death, we lose all this race for power or money or status. We’re better off noticing the simple things and being grateful.
• Anne Lamot talks about her friend who was an alcoholic and what she describes as a “fundamentalist atheist”. Her friend relapses and the worst happens.
• On food and body weight, be nice to yourself. Try to prepare food as if a pastor/priest was coming by.
• You feel the most vulnerable with your family. You learn to forgive and receive forgiveness
• There are many reasons to be hopeful for – moments of awe, our relationships. We have what we need, sometimes it’s a matter of noticing them.